Positive Attitude

*This computer just deleted this whole long post I wrote so I'm really trying hard to put my "Positive Attitude" to work. What are the chances of writing about having a postitive attitude and then having something really frustrating happen!*

First of all I just posted a bunch of posts so scroll down for more Neilsen fun! Adam and I have both been working on being positive lately and I have to say it has made such a huge difference already and it's only been a few days since we decided to really work on it. For the last few years I have been working really hard on being positive (especially through the miscarriages) and it has been a huge blessing in my life, but also a challenge. Since moving into this new ward I have struggled more than I have ever struggled before in a ward. I felt like I was not needed and frankly; not wanted. I was called as the ward choir director and was faced with the challenge of competing against very vocal opinionated people. I felt like I couldn't do anything right and always left feeling pretty bad about myself. More than ever I was so negative. I was sad that I didn't feel loved, I was frustrated that I was being criticized on everything I did, and I was mad that I wasn't getting any appreciation for what I was doing right (if I was doing anything right). I would talk to Adam all the time about my frustrations and now looking back I feel bad because there isn't much to say to an insecure frustrated woman that just wants to be listened to. Adam is a good listener though and that much I could appreciate (and a hug). I was given a couple blessings of comfort and they helped a lot but it wasn't long before I felt the overwhelming power of doubt again. Satan really knows how to bring me down. For Chistmas I led the choir in a couple songs and I was so surprised at the response we got. I got so many compliments on the choir! I was so happy and it [almost] made all the bad experiences not so bad. I had a lot of people tell me they felt the spirit and that has been my goal from the start.

From then on I've felt better about this calling and know that it is what the Lord wants me to be doing right now. He is stretching me and I feel it. I feel his love around me when I wonder if this calling is really meant for me. I'm still struggling to feel comfortable in this new ward and my new calling but I think its more a matter of being comfortable with feeling uncomfortable. We are either moving forwards or moving backwards. I always pray before choosing songs for the choir to sing and when I was feeling at my lowest I was praying for guidance on a song that would help me and the choir and "How Gentle God's Commands" came to mind. The lyrics really hit home and that night Adam sang them to me. Its easy to feel fear and doubt but through the Lord we can feel at peace. My brother talks about those feelings a lot as he serves his mission and I think its pretty normal for us to feel that way. The important part is being aware of it, then doing something about it.

How gentle God's commands
How kind His precepts are
Come cast your burdens on the
Lord and trust His constant care.

Beneath his watchful eye,
His Saints securely dwell;
That hand which bears all nature up
Shall guard His children well.

Why should this anxious load
Press down your weary mind?
Haste, to your Heavenly Father's throne,
And sweet refreshment find.

His goodness stands approved,
Unchanged from day to day;
I'll drop my burden at His feet.
and bear a song away.

Its nice to be reminded of the love my heavenly father has for me. Its so easy to feel the negative feeling of doubt, anger, anxiety; whatever it may be but unless you change your attitude you will be miserable. My dad e-mailed me President Monson's talk on his ABC's for the new year called "Living the Abundant Life". I love love love this talk!! Adam and I have read it together a few times, it is so motivating. I highly recommend reading it. I love the leaders of the Church and know that they are called of God to help uplift and inspire His sons and daughters in this wicked world. He says this about having a positive attitude:

"A in my ABCs refers to attitude. William James, a pioneering American psychologist and philosopher, wrote, “The greatest revolution of our generation is the discovery that human beings, by changing the inner attitudes of their minds, can change the outer aspects of their lives.” So much in life depends on our attitude. The way we choose to see things and respond to others makes all the difference. To do the best we can and then to choose to be happy about our circumstances, whatever they may be, can bring peace and contentment. Charles Swindoll—author, educator, and Christian pastor—said: “Attitude, to me, is more important than the past, than money, than circumstances, than failures, than successes, than what other people think or say or do. It is more important than appearance, giftedness, or skill. It will make or break a company, a church, a home. The remarkable thing is we have a choice every day regarding the attitude we will embrace for that day.” We can’t direct the wind, but we can adjust the sails. For maximum happiness, peace, and contentment, may we choose a positive attitude."

I am so grateful for the power of a positive attitude and know that it changes lives and influences families for the better.

Christmas Around The House

One huge blessing of living back home (besides the obvious of living close to family) is that when my parents want to get rid of something we are here to take it! Like this beautiful piano!! This piano is the one I was raised playing and listening to my dad play. I loved to play with my dad, learn songs, and make up my own. I was so thrilled when my dad said he was giving it to us!! My first thought was "So where is the kitchen table going to go?" because we don't have a big enough kitchen for our table its in our living room. I'm looking forward to when we move and have a kitchen big enough but for now it's not bad. I love having this piano and can't wait to teach my daughter on it like my dad did. I have so many memories of playing this piano. *Sorry about the dark pictures. The sun had already gone down and we have only 1 window in our family room*

This sculpture is what my parents got Adam and I for Christmas. I love it so much!

The JOY blocks is something my Grandma made

Me and Adam's favorite Christmas decoration we have is the village my mom gave me. I've added little parts over the years (like those little trees and little people) and I just love it!

The JOY sculpture I got for under $10 last year :) Also that picture of Christ and the child is one of my favorite pictures. I cried when I first saw it and knew it was something I wanted to bring into my home. I love decoration pieces that bring the spirit into our home.

This painting of 2 men running is what I got for Adam last year I believe. Its called "Hope". The artist Liz Lemon Swindle says this of the painting: "When Mary came to the tomb, she found the stone rolled away and the tomb empty. She ran to the disciples crying, "They have taken away the Lord…and we know not where they have laid him" (John 20:2). Peter and John immediately ran to the tomb. What did they think as they ran? Were they simply curious to see for themselves? Did they fear, like Mary, that their enemies had stolen the body? Or did they remember His promise, "Destroy this temple, and in three days I will raise it up"? The decision that faced Peter and John that Sunday . . ." When Adam and I were in Utah he saw this painting and was overwhelemed with the spirit he said. Is too when I first saw it.

Thankgiving

This year for Thanksgiving I was feeling a little under the weather. I don't know what it is about this pregnancy but I have been sick all the time. Its hard to determine the difference between pregnancy sickeness and the flu but after feeling what pregnancy sicknss feels like I could tell it was something more. I've had the flu twice since being pregnant and along with that came a cold...not fun! Adam played football with a bunch of guys Thanksgiving morning (its tradition!) and I wanted to go but I didn't want to chance getting worse because I was at the tail end of my sickness.

The picture above is of my cousins daughter that just minutes before bonked her head...look at that bump already! Poor thing. I couldn't believe how fast that bump appeared. Every year we get together at the church and set up a few tables and eat like pigs. It's wonderful.

Also my mom and her sisters get together at the church that day and decorate it so it feels more well...cute! It always looks amazing every year.

I was really bummed that I couldn't stay longer at the church because the next morning I had to be to work by 6 which meant getting up at 5. Next year we are having Thanksgiving at my in-laws which I'm excited for...we went there this year but for what seemed like 2 seconds. I love my family and am so grateful for their love and traditions. Adam and I have been thinking about what kind of traditions to hold in our family and we have are so blessed to have the families we have to learn from.

Tea Party at Grandmas

Every year all the girls in the family gets together for a tea party at my grandmas house. Everyone brings something to share. I haven't been the last few years so this year I was excited to be able to go! Next year Grandma voted we all get together to make hats for our next tea party...I'm in!

 Doesn't the food just look magical. I love tea parties. I love this tradition!

As kids we would take pictures in Grandmas backyard because its so beautiful so we just had to take some of the cousins

and precious Madison...

Pregnant Virgin

Several months ago I was a part of a "Ten Virgins" music production. It was amazing! I was a part of it years ago before I was married so it was fun to be in it again after all these years. I played Adi, a woman who is very insecure and compares herself to everyone else. She compares her lamp to the others and wonders if she's enough. I sang the song "More" with my Aunt who played Gabriella. I love the song so much and get goosebumps every time I hear it. I feel like my character was so relate-able, well at least, she was to me. I felt like the character I played was really just for me and I learned a lot through it. The whole production was so well thought out and the spirit was so strong. The only funny part was that I was just telling people I was pregnant when I did it. I was definitely a "foolish" virgin haha!

Our Garden

Now that winter has been here I thought I should probably post these pictures of my garden and backyard. Better late than never! In the beginning of the Fall I neglected my plants because I was just too sick to take care of them. I was so nauseous I had no desire to even water them, how sad is that?

I'm so glad I grew corn because in the fall I used the stalks for decor on my front door step (complete with a hay bale). Yes, I used a book shelf to hold my garden :) We grew tomatoes, corn, zuccini and bell peppers. I thought I did pretty well for my first years' garden.

Look how much our corn grew!! Everyone told us it wasn't going to grow but lo and behold... :)

We had so much zucchini it was coming out our ears :)

I neglected picking them for a while so some of them were huge

Our backyard is small, but still...a backyard so I can't complain. I hate being right up against an apt complex so for my birthday last summer I wanted a big umbrella (which my mom and grandma got me!) it swivels and winds up and down so its really easy to use, really heavy duty and covers practically the whole back yard. Next summer we would love to get a couple chairs out there and maybe even a fire pit :) It also is bigger than it looks in this picture, we have a covered patio that I'm standing on to take the picture. We also have a big storage unit out there.

I got this old trunk when I was in high school. It was on the side of the road with a "free" sign on it that screamed "Take me home!" I forgot all about it until we moved back. I love it in our little backyard

Our first ripe tomato! I was so happy

If I knew we were staying here for a while longer I would love to plant grass or better yet I would love to lay out some cool stone or something and get a patio set but for the time being I will just have to be happy with my little dirt-filled (with weeds included!) backyard.